Two Cars One Rope

I took a trip to the bank a little after lunch today... not that I was on lunch break or anything.. But, I noticed (or couldn't help BUT notice), two cars, that darted out in front of me from Cileste Street. They were joined front bumper to butt by a long yellow rope. "Typical", I thought to myself as I hit the breaks to keep from clipping the rear end of the.. tow-ee. It was a typical day, in fact. Still is. Only I found myself wondering why on earth I'm out in traffic on my day off and I'm full of fried chicken which I ate exactly an hour ago after fighting the lunch crowd.. Times like these make me wonder just how much an instinctive, habitual creature I really am.. I could have stayed at home and waited until after lunch to go out and get ran over by two cars and a rope. Instead I became one of those irritating idiots that drive around at exactly 2 miles under the speed limit in mid-day traffic. You know the kind of people who casually pull over on you when you're speeding and saying the only prayer that you've said all week: "Oh God please don't let me be late!"
So, I thought to myself, "Typical... dude's pulling a broken down car and he's gonna just bust out in front of me as if he's on some deadline.." Suddenly I have this vision of a Gary Larson cartoon: It's a scene from the old west, you know, swinging doors.. boot spurs... glass beer mugs.. big men with big hats.. But then, there's this really tiny cowboy pointing a finger at another tiny cowboy and he says: "Hey you!!.... yeah I'm talkin to you!!" (Like who else would he talk that way to?) Anyhow, I kinda felt like that little insecure cowboy.. I know I couldn't possible pick on anyone going to work at this moment because I would be the biggest hypocrite of all... Anyone who has ever ridden with me knows my distaste for: 1. handicapped-tagged vehicles 2. slow drivers 3. heavy traffic 4. old folks.

Not that I'm a mean person.. but these are a few of my (God help me) most honest prejudices...

Handicap sticker: "Warning.. slow moving con-artist"
Slow Drivers: "I have nothing to do... lets drive around and go shopping."
Heavy Traffic: "these are all welfare recipients going to collect my tax dollars... these people can't POSSIBLY be coming from or going to work!"
Old Folks: "I'm just goin' to the donut shop to shoot the bull and talk about the good ole days."

So like I said, I couldn't possibly pick on the traffic today because I was in fact, riding around with nothing to do and I was actually going 2 miles under the speed limit!!! (My God I was right!)

So instead of getting all puffed up I just relaxed my chest and shoulders and turned off the old "I'll kick his ass!", mode and settled back into "I'm off work today", mode. Besides, at least I'm not being towed! (Ha! ha! Suckaz!)